What am I thankful for?
If you expected a panty themed answer you’d be wrong. Panties are furthest from what I’m thankful for. I mean, when you go to a grocery store, and you by a pound of honeybaked ham wrapped in paper and a string, do you eat the paper and the string? Of course not. When it is Christmas morning, and you unwrap that brand new PS4 you always wanted, do you take the box and paper, and play with it for hours in your room by yourself, or maybe invite your friends over, and say, “Hey! want to play with my wrapping paper?” No, of course not. And if your wife took out a bag from Victoria’s secret, and showed you the new teddy she bought, just for you, would you take it from her, run out of the room and make love to the fabric? No.
Therefore, I am not thankful for underwear. I am however, thankful for The Roots. The writers of the Jimmy Fallon Show. New shoelaces. Muppet movies. Deep dish pizza. Charlie’s Angels. The city of Chicago. Beer. The letter P. The Renaissance. Window shades. Couches. Socks. Medicine Balls. Cuckoo Clocks. Music. Pepsi. Wild Cherry Pepsi. Pomegranates. Business Cards. Buddism. Tissue. Picture Frames. Nature. Peacocks. Koalas. The car engine. Electricty – the Tesla kind. Hardwood Floors. Candles. South Park. Russia. Vegan Milkshakes. Regular Milkshakes. Bridges. Speakers. Tubas. Sign Language. Boobs. T-Shirts. Underwear. Apple computers. Free days at Museums. and of course, my friends.
And underwear. I am thankful for underwear. In general though, not for sexiness sake. And it is nice to have a present wrapped rather than just say, “Here. I got you this card, knock yourself out.”
I’m also thankful for you.
WHAT UP.
~Me.
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